Dear Readers,
I'm sorry for my long silence over the last 10 months. I've put a lot of thought into this blog lately. My demons have been telling me to quit writing reviews. When my depression and anxiety flare up they try to convince me that no one cares what I say, because I don't have anything worthwhile to share. You and I both know that this isn't true. But when those bullies gang up on me they can sometimes succeed in making me feel worthless. Depression and anxiety convince me that when my reviews aren't well written enough that I am actually damaging the reputation of the authors who wrote the books that I'm reviewing. You and I both know that this isn't true. But those bullies are mean and try to take away anything that brings me joy.
Many of you know that I have hopes of being a novelist myself someday. I hadn't written any fiction for years, until a few months ago. I realized that I was never going to accomplish my dreams if I wasn't writing anything. So I reached out to my cousin, and friend, Miriam who is a successful life coach. She has the ability to be a bigger bully than both depression and anxiety. Miriam kindly agreed to hold me accountable to a writing schedule. Three times per week I send her a picture of me writing. I write for an hour (minimum) on Sunday, Wednesday, and Saturday. If she doesn't get a picture of me writing on the designated day (with the exception of planned schedule changes for special events) she reaches out and we discuss what's holding me back. Mostly it's a fear that I suck. My writing sucks. My stories suck. I suck. Depression and anxiety are mean! I'm so afraid that I'm going to put in all this effort (writing is HARD) and fail. However, because of Miriam's help and my perseverance, I've been writing consistently since March, and it feels amazing.
DETOUR: I highly recommend Miriam if you are in the market for a life coach, or a bully who can help you out bully your demons. Miriam is highly supportive; but she also is all about discussing what makes life, and achieving your goals, hard. She's real, and many of us need more real in our lives. Here's a link to her Facebook page.
So now that I have that aspect of my life back on track it's time to get back on track here. I'm setting goals, and making promises. And if I find myself not making those goals, or keeping those promises, I will openly discuss what is holding me back. I'm doing this because I know that my voice matters. People do care what I think. And even if my reviews aren't the most well written reviews out there it's still marketing for the books and authors that I love, and some that I don't love. That said, here is my new blogging schedule:
You can be expecting posts on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, at a minimum. These won't all be reviews. Some will just be check in posts letting you know what I'm reading and what reviews are upcoming. Some will be posts about the new releases I'm looking forward to this coming month. Some will be the life of a bookworm, journal type, posts. But most will be reviews.
Thank you for your patience and understanding.
Sincerely,
Rebecca, aka BookGirlR
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